The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Art of Politicks, by James Bramston.

PUBLICATION NUMBER 177

WILLIAM ANDREWS CLARK MEMORIAL LIBRARY

Universiy of California, Los Angeles

GENERAL EDITORS
William E. Conway, William Andrews Clark Memorial Library George Robert Guffey, University of California, Los Angeles Maximillian E. Novak, University of California, Los Angeles David S. Rodes, University of California, Los Angeles

ADVISORY EDITORS
James L. Clifford, Columbia University Ralph Cohen, University of Virginia Vinton A. Dearing, University of California, Los Angeles Arthur Friedman, University of Chicago Louis A. Landa, Princeton University Earl Miner, Princeton University Samuel H. Monk, University of Minnesota Everett T. Moore, University of California, Los Angeles Lawrence Clark Powell, William Andrews Clark Memorial Libr James Sutherland, University College, London H. T. Swedenberg, Jr., University of California, Los Angeles Robert Vosper, William Andrews Clark Memorial Library

CORRESPONDING SECRETARY
Beverly J. Onley, William Andrews Clark Memorial Library

[Transcriber's Note:
In the original, the text is arranged so that each stanza in "The Art of Politicks" corresponds to a section in Horace's "The Art of Poetry". The excerpts from "The Art of Poetry" are given as footnotes, in the original Latin.]

INTRODUCTION

The meagre information known about James Bramston's life has been ably summarized by F. P. Lock in his introduction to The Man of Taste (ARS 171). For our present purposes, we need only add that Bramston seems to have been acquainted with Pope, who saw The Art of Politicks before it was printed and thought it "pretty". [A] Bramston quite likely met Pope through John Caryll, whose Sussex estate, Lady-Holt, was in the neighborhood of Bramston's parishes.

The Art of Politicks, Bramston's first English poem, was published anonymously in 1729 and advertised in the Monthly Chronicle of 8 December. Several reimpressions followed, as did another London edition, one from Edinburgh, and two from Dublin, all dated 1729, and a London edition of 1731. [B] It was reprinted in Robert Dodsley's Collection of Poems, by Several Hands (1748), where it was attributed to Bramston, and in John Bell's Classical Arrangement of Fugitive Poetry, Volume 5 (1789), with a few notes. [C] Horace Walpole's copy of Dodsley's Collection, with a few rather uninformative manuscript notes, is now in the British Library (C.117.aa.16).

It seems likely that the poem was completed in the summer of 1729. The most recent events that Bramston alludes to are Thomas Woolston's trial for blasphemy of 4 March (p. 27) and Sir Paul Methuen's resignation as Treasurer of the King's Household, which was reported in May (p. 13). [D]

Horace's Ars Poetica was one of the most fertile sources for eighteenth-century imitations and adaptations. Some were completely serious attempts to marry one art to another or to show that all arts share the same fundamental principles; an example of this type is John Gwynn's Art of Architecture (1742; ARS 144). Others, like William King's Art of Cookery (1708) are downright burlesques.

Bramston's usual method falls somewhere between these extremes. He often uses the dignity of poetry to show up the indignity of politics or political writing, as on pp. 5-6 where Horace's advice on choice of subject is transformed into advice [Pg ii] to "Weekly Writers of seditious News," or on page 7, where the rise and fall of South Sea stock fills the place of Horace's famous comparison of archaic and new-coined words to the leaves of the forest. But Bramston's poem more often aspires to the same level as its model; in this respect it resembles Absalom and Achitophel more than Mac Flecknoe.

Several factors help to bring Ars Poetica and The Art of Politicks together. Perhaps most important, Bramston conceives of politics primarily as a verbal art, the use of speech to persuade others to a course of action. Bribes and other crasser incentives appear in the poem, of course, but they are clearly the result of declining standards. For Bramston, rhetoric should govern politics; the House of Commons is a reincarnation of a Roman senate or courtroom. Bramston's inclusion of political writing as well as politics itself in his poem also helps to keep him in Horace's orbit. On Horace's side, his conception of poetry is basically rhetorical and persuasive; it should instruct and delight, move to laughter or tears. Horace's readiness to digress into literary history gives Bramston many opportunities to bring in political history. The Ars Poetica is very much concerned with the world of men; poets are seen in their social roles, and Horace's standards of literary decorum are usually based on social norms: young men in plays should behave the way young men are observed to behave in real life. The Ars Poetica also contains several sharp satiric darts; Horace's contrast between the eloquence of ancient Greece and the commercial arithmetic of modern Rome slides easily into a contrast between Elizabethan learning and Hanoverian place-hunting (pp.32-33). Finally, Horace's urbane and chatty style is as suitable for other subjects as it is for poetry. To appreciate Horace's adaptability, one need only imagine the difficulty of writing an art of politics in imitation of Archibald MacLeish's "Ars Poetica" or Aristotle's Poetics.

Though he does not pretend to Pope's image of himself as a new Horace bringing the whole weight of Roman tradition to bear on contemporary society, Bramston is very clever on the local level at transposing Horace for his own purposes. Horace recounts the increasing complexity and sophistication of theatrical music, Bramston the increasingly elaborated musical celebrations of victorious candidates (pp. 22-23), and Horace's implication that the sophistication of taste is really a decline—"an [Pg iii] impetuous style brought in an unwonted diction" (217)—constitutes an unspoken comment on Bramston's subject. [E] Bramston's page 27 corresponds to Horace's brief history of the theatre, from Thespis's tragedies that he staged on wagons to the silencing of the excessively outspoken chorus of Old Comedy (275-84). Bramston replaces Thespis with Defoe, and the wagon-mounted stage with the cart and pillory. Instead of deploring the silencing of the chorus, Bramston applauds the silencing of Woolston. The contrast between Thespis and Defoe is clearly mock-heroic, but Bramston implies that Woolston's similarity to an ancient satyr is a decline from the character expected of a modern clergyman.

Sometimes the mere fact of changing from a poetic to a political context produces the satire or humour. What is praiseworthy in a poet—the ability to mingle fact and fiction skillfully (151)—becomes highly ironic when applied to a politician who

In Falsehood Probability imploys,
Nor his old Lies with newer Lies destroys.(p. 16)

Not unlike Paintings, Principles appear,
Some best at distance, some when we are near. (p. 36)

More humourous than satirical is the relation between Horace's declaration that there's no place for a mediocre poet (372-73) and Bramston's

The Middle way the best we sometimes call.
But 'tis in Politicks no way at all.

There is no Medium: for the term in vogue
On either side is, Honest Man, or Rogue. (pp. 37-38)

The conclusion of the poem involves a somewhat more complex transformation. Horace closes with a humourously self-deprecating description of the "poetic itch": the afflicted poet stumbles into ditches as he babbles his verses aloud; people flee from him, and with good reason; if he catches anyone, [Pg iv] he hangs on like a leech and reads his victim to death. Bramston describes another "sort of itch," parliamenteering. Sir Harry Clodpole knows better than to make speeches to the electors; he solicits their votes by feasting them, and they run towards him (or his table), not away. They, not he, are the leeches; "they never leave him while he's worth a groat" (p. 45).

Bramston—it seems an excessive refinement to speak of a persona or narrator—presents himself as a rather simple, naive political observer who yearns for clear-cut distinctions between parties; he wants to know where politicians stand on issues. The confusion, the blurring of old party lines, in present-day England is like the monster in the frontispiece. Though simple, he is also well informed. He seems to have a good knowledge of British history since the Restoration, referring casually to the Exclusion Crisis of 1680-81 (p. 15), the Kentish Petition of 1701 (p. 10), and the South Sea Bubble of 1720 (p. 7). All these past events are used to reinforce present lessons. He is up-to-date, as shown by his reference to the recent events in the careers of Methuen and Woolston. He professes familiarity with the characters of the leading politicians and also knows something about what is going on in the constituencies. He knows, or claims to know, how different kinds of listeners will react to different kinds of speeches.

For a son of Christ Church, one of the most Tory Colleges of Tory Oxford, he seems remarkably non-partisan, though his Opposition biases do show through. When he says that "Addison's immortal Page" shows us how "to screen good Ministers from Publick rage" (p. 9), he is clearly aiming at Walpole, known as the "Screenmaster General" since his success in shielding many of the perpetrators of the South Sea Bubble in 1720. (I have not been able to discover the passage of Addison that Bramston had in mind.) When the aspiring orator is urged not to "join with silver Tongue a brazen Face" (p. 24), Walpole is again present by innuendo, for "brazen-face" was another of his nicknames. On the other hand, Bramston also makes fun of the "everlasting Fame" that results from quibbling on Sir Robert's name (p. 6). Bramston perhaps has it both ways here; while ridiculing commonplace puns, he also invites us to remember that "Robin" does indeed sound very much like "robbing."

Sometimes he is more subtle and ironic. This subtlety caused difficulty for at least one contemporary reader, and may do the same for us. Consider the following passage, which parallels Horace's advice always to show Achilles wrathful, Orestes mourning, and the like:

To Likelihood your Characters confine;
Don't turn Sir Paul out, let Sir Paul resign.
In Walpole's Voice (if Factions Ill intend)
Give the two Universities a Friend;
Give Maidston Wit, and Elegance refin'd;
To both the Pelhams give the Scipios Mind;
To Cart'ret, Learning, Eloquence, and Parts;
To George the Second, give all English Hearts. (p. 13)

One of Bramston's early readers found his poem very faulty, and many of his complaints were directed against the passage just quoted.

Such artless art did ever mortal see,
Or politicks so void of policy?

What bard but this could Pelham's train compare
To Roman Scipio's thunder-bolts of war?
Did e'er their wars enrich their native isle,
With foreign treasures and with Spanish spoil?
But hark! and stare with all your ears and eyes!
Walpole is friend to Universities!

Hail politician bard! we ask not whether
A whig or tory; thou art both and neither.
Poultney and Walpole each adorn thy lays,
Which one for love, and one for money praise.
Alike are mention'd, equally are sung
Will. Shippen staunch, and slight Sir Wm. Young.
Bromley and Wyndham share the motley strain,
With Cart'ret, Maidstone, and the Pelhams twain. [F]

This critic finds two main faults in the poem: misinformation and confusion about particular individuals and, more generally, an inability to distinguish Whigs from Tories and give each their due. This last complaint of course mocks Bramston's [Pg vi] lament at the beginning of the poem about the current lack of distinction between parties.

To what extent is this critique justified? What is Bramston trying to do in this passage? There is no problem with the second line: Sir Paul Methuen did indeed resign his office, and one gets the impression from Hervey (pp. 101-2, 250) that he never let anyone forget that he resigned. Thus we have here the most conventional of truisms. Walpole is more difficult. He was certainly no friend of the universities, which were Tory hotbeds. On the other hand, he was reluctant to try to reduce their privileges or bring them more closely under government control, for fear of rousing them to keener opposition. Nowhere else did he follow so faithfully his policy of letting sleeping dogs lie. [G] In a certain sense, then, he might be called a friend of the universities. I have been unable to determine whom Bramston means by "Maidston"—perhaps one of the Finches, the most prominent family in the area of Maidstone, Kent. Bramston's critic is certainly right about the Pelhams: they have nothing whatever in common with the Scipios. Scipio Africanus Major (236-184/3) was one of the most illustrious Roman heroes, consul during the Second Punic War and an outstanding military tactician. Scipio Africanus Minor (c. 185-129) was not only a consul and a military hero but a great patron of letters whom Cicero considered the greatest Roman of them all. [H] Thomas Pelham-Holles, Duke of Newcastle-upon-Tyne (1693-1768), Walpole's chief election manager, was notoriously muddle-headed, nervous, embarrassed, swamped in petty detail, suspicious, fretful, pompous, and indecisive. [J] His brother, Henry Pelham (1695?-1754), was much less well known; reserved and withdrawn, he preferred to work in the background, and his tactical and organizational abilities were not recognized until considerably later. [K] As far as their public image was concerned, then, no two men could be less like the Scipios. Most contemporaries agreed with Bramston's praise of John Carteret, Earl Granville (1690-1763), though many of them also mention other, less admirable traits. [M] As for George II, it depends on whose hearts you consult. An anonymous journalist:

What an Assurance has the Kingdom already given of an unfeigned Affection to their Majesties Persons and Government? How do the People shew that none [Pg vii] are acceptable to them, but those that are so to their Majesties? How can Subjects give stronger Proofs of the high Esteem they have their Sovereign in, for Penetration and Wisdom, than those who entirely rely upon the Royal Discerning, and regulate their Conduct by the King's Direction? [N]

The Queen is hated, the King despised, their son both the one and the other, and such a spirit of disaffection to the family and general discontent with the present Government is spread all over the Kingdom, that it is absolutely impossible for things to go on in the track they are now in. [O]

By now Bramston's method should be clear: he is praising everyone, but the praise fits the Opposition (such as Carteret) much better than it does the Government (the Pelhams). There is perhaps room for doubt about Walpole and George II, but Bramston's critic's failure to see the irony in the comparison of Pelhams to Scipios must be the result of sheer obtuseness. The rationale for Bramston's technique becomes clearer if we look again at Horace and recall that the basis of his advice is to follow conventional opinion. The conventional opinions that Bramston is by implication urging his pupil to follow are those of the politician's supporters and dependents. It just happens that Bramston has chosen his examples so that the Opposition conventions are closer to reality than the Government conventions. [P]

All this is fun, but it is quite inoffensive. There's no animus, no vehemence, no bite. Politics do not really engage any of Bramston's strong convictions. The self-portrait he offers us on pages 29-30 would be for many political satirists of the period a transparent facade of mock-innocence, but it seems to fit Bramston very accurately:

Alas Poor Me, you may my fortune guess: I write, and yet Humanity profess: [Pg viii]

I love the King, the Queen, and Royal Race: I like the Government, but want no Place:

Was never in a Plot, my Brain's not hurt; I Politicks to Poetry convert.

By contrast to the increasing acrimony of most political satire of the late 1720's, this attitude is at least refreshing.

NOTES TO THE ART OF POLITICKS

Given the topical nature of The Art of Politicks, the best use of my remaining space is probably to annotate the poem. From what I have learned about its background—and many mysteries remain—I have tried to choose what seems most relevant. In the interests of saving space, and since full annotation is not possible anyway, I have kept documentation to a minimum, especially where the information comes from easily available sources like the DNB or, conversely, has been pieced together from several sources. Some works are occasionally referred to by abbreviation or author's name; the ones not mentioned in the Notes to the Introduction are the following: [Q]

Cobbett: William Cobbett, The Parliamentary History of England from the Earliest Period to the Year 1803 (London: T. C. Hansard, 1806-20).

Ellis: Jonathan Swift, A Discourse of the Contests and Dissentions between the Nobles and Commons in Athens and Rome, ed. Frank H. Ellis (Oxford: Clarendon Press, 1967).

Grey: Anchitel Grey, Debates of the House of Commons from the Year 1667 to the Year 1694 (London, 1763).

Thomas: Peter D. G. Thomas, The House of Commons in the Eighteenth Century (Oxford: Clarendon Press, 1971).

Realey: Charles B. Realey, The Early Opposition to Sir Robert Walpole 1720-1727 (Lawrence: University of Kansas Press, 1931).

[Transcriber's Note:
The paragraph and line numbers in bold,which begin the footnotes, i.e. P. 1, line 1.
are referenced to the original text, they do not correspond to the computerized version.]

NOTES TO THE INTRODUCTION

BIBLIOGRAPHICAL NOTE

The facsimile of The Art of Politicks (1729) is reproduced by permission from a copy of the first edition (Shelf Mark: *PR3326/B287A8; Foxon B383) in the William Andrews Clark Memorial Library. The total type-page (p. 19) measures 152 x 93 mm.

— RISUM TENEATIS AMICI ?

THE
ART of POLITICKS,
In Imitation of
HORACE's
ART of POETRY.

LONDON :

Printed for Lawton Gilliver,
at Homer's Head against St. Dunstan's Church in Fleet-Street.

MDCCXXIX.

THE
ART of POLITICKS,
In Imitation of
HORACE's
ART of POETRY.

[1]

F to a Human Face Sir James [i]should draw
A Gelding's Mane, and Feathers of Maccaw,
A Lady's Bosom, and a Tail of Cod,
Who could help laughing at a Sight so odd?
[Pg 2] Just such a Monster, Sirs, pray think before ye,
When you behold one Man both Whig and Tory.
Not more extravagant are Drunkard's Dreams,
Than Low-Church Politicks with High-Church Schemes. [ii]
Painters, you'll say, may their own Fancies use,
And Freeborn Britons may their Party chuse;
That's true, I own: but can one Piece be drawn
For Dove and Dragon, Elephant and Fawn?

[2] Speakers profess'd, who Gravity pretend, )
With motley Sentiments their Speeches blend: )
Begin like Patriots [iii], and like Courtiers end. )
[Pg 3] Some love to roar, the Constitution's broke,
And others on the Nation's Debts to joke;
Some rail, (they hate a Commonwealth so much,)
What e'er the Subject be, against the Dutch;
While others, with more fashionable Fury,
Begin with Turnpikes, [iv]and conclude with Fleury; [v]
Some, when th' Affair was Blenheim's glorious Battle,
Declaim'd against importing Irish Cattle.
But you, from what e'er Side you take your Name,
Like Anna's Motto, always be the same.

[Pg 4] [3] Outsides deceive, 'tis hard the Truth to know; )
Parties from quaint Denominations flow, )
As Scotch and Irish Antiquaries show. [vi] )
The Low are said to take Fanaticks Parts,
The High are bloody Papists in their Hearts.
Caution and Fear to highest Faults have run;
In pleasing both the Parties, you please none.
Who in the House affects declaiming Airs,
Whales in Change-Alley paints: in Fish-Street, Bears.
Some Metaphors, some Handkerchiefs display; )
These peep in Hats, while those with Buttons play, )
And make me think it Repetition-Day; [vii] )
[Pg 5] There Knights haranguing hug a neighb'ring Post,
And are but Quorum Orators at most.
Sooner than thus my want of Sense expose, )
I'd deck out Bandy-Legs with Gold-Clock't Hose, )
Or wear a Toupet-Wig without a Nose. [viii] )
Nay, I would sooner have thy Phyz, I swear,
Surintendant des Plaisirs d' Angleterre. [ix]

[4] Ye Weekly Writers of seditious News,
Take Care your Subjects artfully to chuse,
Write Panegyrick strong, or boldly rail,
You cannot miss Preferment, or a Goal.
[Pg 6] Wrap up your Poison well, nor fear to say
What was a Lye last Night is Truth to Day;
Tell this, sink that, arrive at Ridpath's Praise, [x]
Let Abel Roper your Ambition raise.
To Lye fit Opportunity observe,
Saving some double Meaning in reserve;
But oh, you'll merit everlasting Fame,
If you can quibble on Sir Robert's Name.
In State-Affairs use not the Vulgar Phrase,
Talk Words scarce known in good Queen Besse's days.
New Terms let War or Traffick introduce,
And try to bring Persuading Ships in Use.
[Pg 7] Coin Words: in coining ne'er mind common Sense,
Provided the Original be French.

[5] Like South-Sea Stock, Expressions rise and fall:
King Edward's Words are now no Words at all.
Did ought your Predecessors Genius cramp?
Sure ev'ry Reign may have it's proper Stamp.
All Sublunary things of Death partake;
What Alteration does a Cent'ry make?
Kings and Comedians all are mortal found,
Cæsar and Pinkethman [xi] are under Ground.
What's not destroy'd by Times devouring Hand?
Where's Troy, and where's the May-Pole [xii] in the Strand?
[Pg 8] Pease, Cabbages, and Turnips once grew, where
Now stands new Bond-street, and a newer Square; [xiii]
Such Piles of Buildings now rise up and down;
London itself seems going out of Town.
Our Fathers cross'd from Fulham in a Wherry,
Their Sons enjoy a Bridge at Putney-Ferry. [xiv]
Think we that modern Words eternal are?
Toupet, and Tompion, Cosins, and Colmar
Hereafter will be call'd by some plain Man
A Wig, a Watch, a Pair of Stays, a Fan.
To Things themselves if Time such change affords,
Can there be any trusting to our Words.

[Pg 9] [6] To screen good Ministers from Publick rage, )
And how with Party Madness to engage, )
We learn from Addison's immortal Page. )
The Jacobite's ridiculous Opinion
Is seen from Tickel's Letter to Avignon. [xv]
But who puts Caleb's Country-Craftsman [xvi] out,
Is still a secret, and the World's in doubt.

[7] Not long since Parish-Clerks, with saucy airs,
Apply'd King David's Psalms to State-Affairs.
Some certain Tunes to Politicks belong,
On both Sides Drunkards love a Party-Song.

[Pg 10] [8] If full a-cross the Speaker's Chair I go,
Can I be said the Rules o'th' House to know?
I'll ask, nor give offence without intent,
Nor through meer Sheepishness be impudent. [xvii]

[9] In Acts of Parliament avoid Sublime,
Nor e'er Address his Majesty in Rhime;
An Act of Parliament's a serious thing,
Begins with Year of Lord and Year of King;
Keeps close to Form, in every word is strict,
When it would Pains and Penalties inflict.
Soft Words suit best Petitioners intent;
Soft Words, O ye Petitioners of Kent! [xviii]

[Pg 11] [10] Who e'er harangues before he gives his Vote,
Should send sweet Language from a tuneful Throat.
Pultney [xix] the coldest Breast with Zeal can fire,
And Roman Thoughts by Attick Stile inspire;
He knows from tedious Wranglings to beguile
The serious House into a chearful Smile;
When the great Patriot paints his anxious Fears
For England's Safety, I am lost in Tears.
But when dull Speakers strive to move compassion,
I pity their poor Hearers, not the Nation:
Unless young Members to the purpose speak,
I fall a laughing, or I fall asleep.

[Pg 12] [11] Can Men their inward Faculties controul?
Is not the Tongue an Index to the Soul?
Laugh not in time of Service to your God,
Nor bully, when in Custody o'th' Rod; [xx]
Look Grave, and be from Jokes and Grinning far,
When brought to sue for Pardon at the Bar. [xxi]
If then you let your ill-tim'd Wit appear,
Knights, Citizens, and Burgesses will sneer.

[12] For Land, or Trade, not the same Notions sire
The City-Merchant, and the Country-Squire;
Their Climes are distant, tho' one Cause [xxii] unites
The Lairds of Scotland, and the Cornish Knights.

[Pg 13] [13] To Likelihood your Characters confine;
Don't turn Sir Paul out, let Sir Paul resign.
In Walpole's Voice (if Factions Ill intend)
Give the Two Universities a Friend;
Give Maidston Wit, and Elegance refin'd;
To both the Pelhams give the Scipios Mind;
To Cart'ret, Learning, Eloquence, and Parts;
To George the Second, give all English Hearts.

[14] Sometimes fresh Names in Politicks produce,
And Factions yet unheard of introduce;
And if you dare attempt a thing so new,
Make to itself the Flying-Squadron true. [xxiii]

[Pg 14] [15] To speak is free, no Member is debarr'd:
But Funds and National Accounts are hard:
Safer on common Topicks to discourse,
The Malt-Tax, and a Military Force.
On these each Coffee-House will lend a hint,
Besides a thousand things that are in Print.
But steal not Word for Word, nor Thought for Thought:
For you'll be teaz'd to death, if you are caught.
When Factious Leaders boast increasing strength,
Go not too far, nor follow ev'ry Length:
Leave room for Change, turn with a grace about,
And swear you left 'em, when you found 'em out,

[Pg 15] [16] With Art and Modesty your Part maintain:
And talk like Col'nel Titus, [xxiv] not like Lane; [xxv]
The Trading-Knight with Rants his Speech begins,
Sun, Moon, and Stars, and Dragons, Saints, and Kings:
But Titus said, with his uncommon Sense,
When the Exclusion-Bill was in suspense,
I hear a Lyon in the Lobby roar;
Say, Mr. Speaker, shall we shut the door
And keep him there, or shall we let him in
To try if we can turn him out again?

[17] Some mighty Blusterers Impeach with noise,
And call their Private Cry, the Nation's Voice;

[Pg 16] [18] From Folio's of Accounts they take their handles,
And the whole Ballance proves a pound of Candles;
As if Paul's Cupola were brought to bed,
After hard Labour, of a small Pin's Head.

[19] Some Rufus, [xxvi] some the Conqueror bring in,
And some from Julius Cæsar's days begin.
A cunning Speaker can command his chaps,
And when the House is not in humour, stops;
In Falsehood Probability imploys,
Nor his old Lies with newer Lies destroys.

[Pg 17] [20] If when you speak, you'd hear a Needle fall,
And make the frequent hear-hims rend the wall,
In matters suited to your Taste engage,
Remembring still your Quality and Age.
Thy task be this, young Knight, and hear my Song
What Politicks to ev'ry Age belong.

[21] When Babes can speak, Babes should be taught to say,
King George the Second's Health, Huzza, Huzza!
Boys should learn Latin for Prince William's [xxvii] sake,
And Girls Louisa their Example make.

[Pg 18] [22] More loves the Youth, just come to his Estate,
To range the fields, than in the House debate;
More he delights in fav'rite Jowler's Tongue,
Than in Will Shippen, or Sir William Yong: [xxviii]
If in one Chase he can two Horses kill,
He cares not twopence for the Land-Tax Bill:
Loud in his Wine, in Women not o'er nice,
He damns his Uncles if they give advice;
Votes as his Father did, when there's a Call,
But had much rather, never Vote at all.

[Pg 19] [23] We take a diff'rent Turn at Twenty-six,
And lofty thoughts on some Lord's Daughter fix;
With Men in Pow'r strict Friendship we persue,
With some considerable Post in view.
A Man of Forty fears to change his Note,
One way to Speak, and t'other way to Vote;
Careful his Tongue in Passion to command,
Avoids the Bar, and Speaker's Reprimand.

[24] In Bags the Old Man lets his Treasure rust,
Afraid to use it, or the Funds to trust;
When Stocks are low, he wants the heart to buy,
And through much caution sees 'em rise too high;
[Pg 20] Thinks nothing rightly done since Seventy-eight,
Swears present Members do not talk, but prate:
In Charles the Second's days, says he, ye Prigs,
Torys were Torys then, and Whigs were Whigs.
Alas! this is a lamentable Truth,
We lose in age, as we advance in youth:
I laugh, when twenty will like eighty talk,
And old Sir John with Polly Peachum walk. [xxix]

[25] Now as to Double, or to False Returns,
When pockets suffer, and when anger burns,
O Thing surpassing faith! Knight strives with Knight,
When both have brib'd, and neither's in the right.
[Pg 21] The Bayliff's self is sent for in that case,
And all the Witnesses had face to face.
Selected Members soon the fraud unfold,
In full Committee of the House 'tis told;
Th' incredible Corruption is destroy'd,
The Chairman's angry, and th' Election void.

[26] Those who would captivate the well-bred throng,
Should not too often speak, nor speak too long:
Church, nor Church Matters ever turn to Sport,
Nor make St. Stephen's Chappel, Dover-Court. [xxx]

[27] The Speaker, when the Commons are assembl'd,
May to the Græcian Chorus be resembl'd;
[Pg 22] 'Tis his the Young and Modest to espouse,
And see none draw, or challenge in the House:
'Tis his Old Hospitality to use,
And three good Printers for the House to chuse;
To let each Representative be heard,
And take due care the Chaplain be preferr'd,
To hear no Motion made that's out of joint,
And where he spies his Member, make his point.

[28] To Knights new chosen in old time would come
The County Trumpet, and perhaps a Drum;
Now when a Burgess new Elect appears,
Come Trainbands, Horseguards, Footguards, Grenadeers;
[Pg 23] When the majority the Town-clerk tells,
His Honour pays the Fiddles, Waits, [xxxi] and Bells:
Harangues the Mob, and is as wise and great,
As the most Mystic Oracle of State.

[29] When the Duke's Grandson for the County stood,
His Beef was fat, and his October good;
His Lordship took each Ploughman by the fist,
Drunk to their Sons, their Wives and Daughters kiss'd;
But when strong Beer their Freeborn Hearts inflames,
They sell him Bargains, [xxxii] and they call him Names.
Thus is it deem'd in English Nobles wise
To stoop for no one reason but to rise.

[Pg 24] [30] Election matters shun with cautious awe,
O all ye Judges Learned in the Law;
A Judge by Bribes as much himself degrades,
As Dutchess Dowager by Masquerades.

[31] Try not with Jests obscene to force a Smile,
Nor lard your Speech with Mother Needham's Stile: [xxxiii]
Let not your tongue to Ωλδφιελδισμυς run,
And Κιββερισμυς [xxxiv] with abhorrence shun;
Let not your looks affected words disgrace,
Nor join with silver Tongue a brazen Face;
Let not your hands, like Tallboys, [xxxv] be employ'd,
And the mad rant of Tragedy avoid.
[Pg 25] Just in your Thoughts, in your Expression clear,
Neither too modest, nor too bold appear.

[32] Others in vain a like Success will boast,
He speaks most easy, who has study'd most.

[33] A Peer's pert Heir has to the Commons spoke
A vile Reflection, or a Bawdy Joke;
Call'd to the House of Lords, of this beware,
'Tis what the Bishops Bench will never bear.
Amongst the Commons is such freedom shown,
They lash each other, and attack the Throne:
Yet so unskilful or so fearful some,
For nine that speak there's nine-and-forty dumb.

[Pg 26] [34] When James the first, at great Britannia's helm,
Rul'd this word-clipping and word-coining Realm,
No words to Royal favour made pretence,
But what agreed in sound and clash'd in sense.
Thrice happy he! how great that Speaker's praise,
Whose ev'ry Period look'd an hundred ways.
What then? we now with just abhorrence shun
The trifling Quibble, and the School-boys Pun;
Tho' no great Connoisseur, I make a shift
Just to find out a Durfey from a Swift;
I can discern with half an eye, I hope,
Mist [xxxvi] from Jo Addison, from Eusden Pope:
I know a Farce from one of Congreve's Plays,
And Cibber's Opera [xxxvii] from Johnny Gay's.

[Pg 27] [35] When pert Defoe his sawcy Papers writ,
He from a Cart was Pillor'd for his Wit:
By Mob was pelted half a Morning's space,
And rotten Eggs besmear'd his yellow face;
The Censor [xxxviii] then improv'd the list'ning Isle,
And held both Parties in an artful Smile.
A Scribbling Crew now pinching Winter brings, )
That spare no earthly nor no heav'nly things, )
Nor Church, nor State, nor Treasurers, nor Kings.)
But Blasphemy displeases all the Town; )
And for defying Scripture, Law, and Crown, )
Woolston should pay his Fine, and lose his Gown,)

[Pg 28] [36] It must be own'd the Journals try all ways
To merit their respective Party's praise:
They jar in every Article from Spain;
A War these threaten, those a Peace maintain:
Tho' Lye they will, to give 'em all their due,
In Foreign matters, and Domestick too.
Whoe'er thou art that would'st a Postman write,
Enquire all day, and hearken all the night.
Sure, Gazetteers and Writers of Courants
Might soon exceed th' Intelligence of France:
To be out-done old England should refuse,
As in her Arms, so in her Publick News;
But Truth is scarce, the Scene of Action large,
And Correspondence an excessive Charge.

[Pg 29] [37] There are who say, no Man can be a Wit
Unless for Newgate or for Bedlam fit;
Let Pamphleteers abusive Satyr write,
To shew a Genius is to shew a Spite:
That Author's Works will ne'er be reckon'd good
Who has not been where Curl the Printer [xxxix] stood.

[38] Alass Poor Me, you may my fortune guess:
I write, and yet Humanity profess;
(Tho' nothing can delight a modern Judge,
Without ill-nature and a private Grudge)
I love the King, the Queen, and Royal Race:
I like the Government, but want no Place:
[Pg 30] Too low in Life to be a Justice I,
And for a Constable, thank God, too high;
Was never in a Plot, my Brain's not hurt;
I Politicks to Poetry convert.

[39] A Politician must (as I have read)
Be furnish'd, in the first place, with a Head:
A Head well fill'd with Machiavelian Brains,
And stuff'd with Precedents of former Reigns:
Must Journals read, and Magna Charta quote;
But acts still wiser, if he speaks by Note:
Learns well his Lesson, and ne'er fears mistakes:
For Ready Money Ready Speakers makes;
He must Instructions and Credentials draw,
Pay well the Army, and protect the Law:
[Pg 31] Give to his Country what's his Country's due,
But first help Brothers, Sons, and Cousins too.
He must read Grotius upon War and Peace, [xl]
And the twelve Judges Salary encrease.
He must oblige old Friends and new Allies,
And find out Ways and Means for fresh Supplies.
He must the Weavers Grievances redress,
And Merchants wants in Merchants words express.

[40] Dramatick Poets that expect the Bays,
Should cull our Histories for Party Plays;
[Pg 32] Wickfort's Embassador [xli] should fill their head,
And the State-Tryals carefully be read:
For what is Dryden's Muse and Otway's Plots
To th' Earl of Essex or the Queen of Scots? [xlii]

[41] 'Tis said that Queen Elizabeth could speak,
At twelve years old, right Attick full-mouth'd Greek;
Hence was the Student forc'd at Greek to drudge,
If he would be a Bishop, or a Judge.
Divines and Lawyers now don't think they thrive,
'Till promis'd places of men still alive:
How old is such an one in such a Post?
The answer is, he's seventy-five almost:
[Pg 33] Th' Arch-Bishop, and the Master of the Rolls? [xliii]
Neither is young, and one's as old as Paul's.
Will Men, that ask such Questions, publish books
Like learned Hooker's or Chief Justice Cook's?

[42] On Tender Subjects with discretion touch,
And never say too little, or too much.
On Trivial Matters Flourishes are wrong,
Motions for Candles never should be long:
Or if you move, in case of sudden Rain,
To shut the Windows, speak distinct and plain.
Unless you talk good English downright Sense,
Can you be understood by Serjeant Spence? [xliv]

[Pg 34] [43] New Stories always should with Truth agree
Or Truth's half-Sister, Probability:
Scarce could Toft's Rabbits [xlv] and pretended throws [xlvi]
On half the Honourable House impose.

[44] When Cato speaks, young Shallow runs away,
And swears it is so dull he cannot stay:
When Rakes begin on Blasphemy to border,
Bromley and Hanmer [xlvii] cry aloud—— To Order.
The point is this, with manly Sense and ease
T' inform the Judgment, and the Fancy please.
Praise it deserves, nor difficult the thing,
At once to serve one's Countrey and one's King.
[Pg 35] Such Speeches bring the wealthy Tonson's gain, [xlviii] )
From Age to Age they minuted remain, )
As Precedents for George the twentieth's Reign. )

[45] Is there a Man on earth so perfect found,
Who ne'er mistook a word in Sense or Sound?
Not Blund'ring, but persisting is the fault;
No mortal Sin is Lapsus Linguæ thought:
Clerks may mistake; consid'ring who 'tis from,
I pardon little Slips in Cler. Dom. Com. [xlix]
[Pg 36] But let me tell you I'll not take his part,
If ev'ry Thursday he date Die Mart. [l]
Of Sputt'ring mortals 'tis the fatal curse,
By mending Blunders still to make 'em worse.
Men sneer when—— gets a lucky Thought,
And stare if Wyndham [li] should be nodding caught.
But sleeping's what the wisest men may do,
Should the Committee chance to sit 'till Two.

[46] Not unlike Paintings, Principles appear,
Some best at distance, some when we are near.
The love of Politicks so vulgar's grown,
My Landlord's Party from his Sign is known:
[Pg 37] Mark of French wine, see Ormond's Head appear,
While Marlb'rough's Face directs to Beer and Beer:
Some Buchanan's, the Pope's Head some like best,
The Devil Tavern is a standing jest.

[47] Whoe'er you are that have a Seat secure,
Duly return'd, and from Petition sure,
Stick to your Friends in whatsoe'er you say;
With strong aversion shun the Middle way:
The Middle way the best we sometimes call,
But 'tis in Politicks no way at all.
A Trimmer's what both Parties turn to sport,
By Country hated, and despis'd at Court.
[Pg 38] Who would in earnest to a Party come,
Must give his Vote, not whimsical, but plumb.
There is no Medium: for the term in vogue
On either side is, Honest Man, or Rogue.
Can it be difficult our Minds to show,
Where all the Difference is, Yes, or No?

[48] In all Professions, Time and Pains give Skill,
Without hard Study, dare Physicians kill?
Can he that ne'er read Statutes or Reports,
Give Chamber-Counsel, or urge Law in Courts?
But ev'ry Whipster knows Affairs of State,
Nor fears on nicest Subjects to debate.
[Pg 39] A Knight of eighteen hundred pounds a year—
Who minds his Head, if his Estate be clear?
Sure he may speak his mind, and tell the House,
He matters not the Government a Louse.
Lack-learning Knights, these things are safely said
To Friends in private, at the Bedford-Head:
But in the House, before your Tongue runs on,
Consult Sir James, Lord William's dead and gone.
Words to recall is in no Member's power,
One single word may send you to the Tower.

[49] The wrong'd to help, the lawless to restrain,
Thrice ev'ry Year, in ancient Egbert's Reign,
[Pg 40] The Members to the Mitchelgemot went,
In after Ages call'd the Parliament;
Early the Mitchelgemot did begin
T' enroll their Statutes, on a Parchment Skin:
For impious Treason hence no room was left,
For Murder, for Polygamy, or Theft:
Since when the Senates power both Sexes know
From Hops and Claret, Soap and Callico.
Now wholesom Laws young Senators bring in
'Gainst Goals, Attornies, Bribery, and Gin.
Since such the nature of the British State,
[Pg 41] The power of Parliament so old and great,
Ye 'Squires and Irish Lords, 'tis worth your care )
To be return'd for City, Town, or Shire, )
By Sheriff, Bailiff, Constable, or Mayor. )

[50] Some doubt, which to a Seat has best Pretence,
A man of Substance, or a man of Sense:
But never any Member feats will do,
Without a Head-piece and a Pocket too;
Sense is requir'd the depth of Things to reach,
And Money gives Authority to Speech.

[51] A Man of Bus'ness won't 'till ev'ning dine;
Abstains from Women, Company, and Wine:
[Pg 42] From Fig's new Theatre he'll miss a Night,
Tho' Cocks, and Bulls, and Irish Women fight:
Nor sultry Sun, nor storms of soaking Rain,
The Man of Bus'ness from the House detain:
Nor speaks he for no reason but to say,
I am a Member, and I spoke to day.
I speak sometimes, you'll hear his Lordship cry,
Because Some speak that have less Sense than I.

[52] The Man that has both Land and Money too
May wonders in a Trading Borough do:
They'll praise his Ven'son, and commend his Port, )
Turn their two former Members into Sport, )
And, if he likes it, Satyrize the Court. )
[Pg 43] But at a Feast 'tis difficult to know
From real Friends an undiscover'd Foe;
The man that swears he will the Poll secure,
And pawns his Soul that your Election's sure,
Suspect that man: beware, all is not right,
He's, ten to one, a Corporation-Bite.

[53] Alderman Pond, a downright honest Man,
Would say, I cannot help you, or I can:
To spend your Money, Sir, is all a jest;
Matters are settled, set your heart at rest:
We've made a Compromise, and, Sir, you know,
That sends one Member High, and t'other Low.
[Pg 44] But if his good Advice you would not take,
He'd scorn your Supper, and your Punch forsake:
Leave you of mighty Interest to brag,
And poll two Voices like Sir Robert Fag. [lii]

[54] Parliamenteering is a sort of Itch,
That will too oft unwary Knights bewitch.
Two good Estates Sir Harry Clodpole spent;
Sate thrice, but spoke not once, in Parliament:
Two good Estates are gone—Who'll take his word?
Oh! should his Uncle die, he'd spend a third:
He'd buy a House, his happiness to crown,
Within a mile of some good Borough-Town;
[Pg 45] Tag, Rag, and Bobtail to Sir Harry's run,
Men that have Votes, and Women that have none:
Sons, Daughters, Grandsons, with his Honour dine;
He keeps a Publick-House without a Sign.
Coolers and Smiths extol th' ensuing Choice,
And drunken Taylors boast their right of Voice.
Dearly the free-born neighbourhood is bought,
They never leave him while he's worth a groat:
So Leeches stick, nor quit the bleeding wound,
Till off they drop with Skinfuls to the ground.

FINIS.

WILLIAM ANDREWS CLARK
MEMORIAL LIBRARY

UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA, LOS ANGELES

The Augustan Reprint Society

PUBLICATIONS IN PRINT

Excerpts from Horace's "Art of Poetry"

Humano capiti cervicem Piélor equinam
Jungere si velit, & varias inducere plumas,
Undiq; collatis membris, ut turpiter atrum
Definat in piscem mulier formosa superne:
Spectatum admissi, risum teneatis, amici?
Credite, Pisones, isti tabulæ fore librum
Persimilem, cujus, velit ægri somnia, vanæ
Fingentur species. Pictoribus atq; Poetis
Quidlibet audendi semper fuit æqua potestas;
Scimus, & hanc veniam petimusq; damusq; vicissim:
Sed non ut placidis coeant immitia, non ut
Serpentes avibus geminentur, tigribus agni.

Incœptis gravibus plerumq; & magna professis
Purpureus late qui splendeat unus & alter
Assuitur pannus, cum lucus & ara Dianæ,
Aut properantis aquæ per amænos ambitus agros,
Aut flumen Rhenum, aut pluvius describitur arcus;
Sed nunc non erar his locus: & fortasse cupressum,
Scis simulare, quid hoc, si fractis enatat exspes
Navibus, ære dato qui pingitur? amphora cæpit
Institui, currente rota cur urceus exit?
Deniq; sit quidvis simplex duntaxat & unum.

Decipimur specie recti; brevis esse laboro,
Obscurus fio: sectantem lævia, nervi
Deficiunt animique: professus grandia, turget.
Qui variare cupit rem prodigialiter unam
Delphinum sylvis appingit, fluctibus aprum.
In vitium ducit culpæ fuga, si caret arte.
Æmilium circa ludum faber imus & ungues
Exprimet, & molles imitabitur ore capillos;
Infelix operis summa, quia ponere totum
Nesciet; hunc ego me, si quid componere curem,
Non magis esse velim, quam pravo vivere naso
Spectandum nigris oculis nigroq; capillo.

Sumite materiam vestris, qui scribitis, æquam
Viribus; & versate diu, quid ferre recusent,
Quid valeant humeri: cui lecta potenter erit res,
Nec facundia deseret hunc nec lucidus ordo.
Ordinis hæc virtus erit & venus, aut ego fallor,
Ut jam nunc dicat jam nunc debentia dici:
Pleraq; differat, & præsens in tempus omittat.
Dixeris egregie, notum si callida verbum
Reddiderit junctura novum; si forte necesse est
Indiciis monstrare recentibus abdita rerum
Fingere cinctutis non exaudita Cethegis
Continget, dabiturq; licentia sumpta pudenter
Et nova sictaq; nuper habebunt verba fidem, si
Græco fonte cadant.

—licuit, semperque licebit
Signatum præsente nota procudere nomen.
Ut Sylvæ foliis pronos mutantur in annos:
Prima cadunt, ita verborum vetus interit ætas,
Debemur morti nos nostraq; sive receptus
Terra Neptunus classes aquilonibus arcet,
Regis opus, sterilisve diu palus aptaque remis
Vicinas urbes alit & grave sentit aratrum.
Seu cursum mutavit iniquum frugibus amnis
Doctus iter melius; mortalia facta peribunt,
Nedum sermonum stet honos & gratia vivax.
Multa renascentur quæ jam cecidere, cadentq;
Quæ nunc sunt in honore vocabula, si volet usus,
Quem penes arbitrium est & jus norma loquendi.

Res gestæ regumq; ducumq; & tristia bella
Quo scribi possent numero, monstravit Homerus.
Versibus impariter junctis querimonia primum,
Post etiam voti inclusa est voti sententia compos.
Quis tamen exiguos elegos emiserit auctor
Grammatici certant, & adhuc sub judice lis est.

Musa dedit fidibus Divos puerosq; Deorum,
Et pugilem victorem, & equum certamine primum,
Et juvenum curas, & libera vina referre.

Descriptas servare vices operumq; colores
Cur ego si nequeo ignoroq;, poeta salutor?
Cur nescire pudens prave quam discere malo?

Versibus exponi tragicis res comica nonvult
Indignatur item privatis ac prope socco
Dignis carminibus narrari cæna Thyestæ,
Interdum tamen & vocem Comædia tollit,
Iratusq; Chremes tumido delitigat ore.
Telephus & Peleus, cum pauper & exul uterq;,
Projicit ampullas & sesqui pedalia verba.

Non satis est pulchra esse Poemata, dulcia sunto.
Ut ridentibus arrident, ita flentibus adflent
Humani vultus; si vis me flere, dolendum est
Primum ipsi tibi: tunc tua me infortunia lædent
Telephe, vel Peleu; male si mandata loqueris,
Aut dormitabo aut ridebo.

Format enim Natura prius nos intus ad omnem
Fortunarum habitum, &c.
Post effert animi motus interprete Lingua tristia mæstum
Vultum verba decent, &c.
Si dicentis erunt fortunis absona dicta,
Romani tollent equites peditesq; cachinnum.

Intererit multum Divusne loquetur, an Heros:
Mercatorne vagus, cultorne virentis agelli:
Colchus, an Assyrius: Thebis nutritus, an Argis.

Aut famam sequere, aut sibi convenientia finge
Scriptor; honoratum si forte reponis Achillem,
Impiger, iracundus, inexorabilis, acer,
Jura neget sibi nata, nihil non arroget armis;
Sit Medea ferox invictaq;, flebilis Ino,
Perfidus Ixion, Io vaga, tristis Orestes.

Siquid inexpertum scenæ committis, & audes
Personam formare novam, servetur ad imum
Qualis ab incæpto processerit, & sibi constet.

Difficile est proprie communia dicere: tuq;
Rectius Iliacum carmen deducis in actus,
Quam si proferres ignota indictaq; primus;
Publica materies privati juris erit, si
Nec circa vilem patulumq; moraberis orbem,
Nec verbum verbo curabis reddere fidus
Interpres, nec sic desilies imitator in arctum
Unde pedem proferre pudor vetet aut operis lex.

Nec sic incipies ut Scriptor Cyclicus olim.
Fortunam Priami cantabo & nobile bellum;
Quanto rectius hic qui nil molitur inepte,
Dic mihi Musa virum captæ post tempera Trojæ
Qui mores hominum multorum vidit & urbes.

Non fumum ex fulgore, sed ex fumo dare lucem
Cogitat:

Quid dignum tanto feret hic promissor hiatu?
Parturiunt montes, nascetur ridiculus mus.

Nec reditum Diomedis ab interitu Meleagri,
Nec gemino bellum Trojanum orditur ab ovo;
—— & quæ
Desperat tractata nitescere posse, relinquit;
Atq; ita mentitur, sic veris falsa remiscet
Primo ne medium, medio ne discrepet imum.

Tu quid ego & populus mecum desideret, audi;
Si plausoris eges aulæa manentis, & usq;
Sessuri donec cantor, Vos plaudite, dicat,
Ætatis cujusq; notandi sunt tibi mores,
Mobilibusq; decor naturis dandus & annis.

Reddere qui voces jam scit puer, & pede certo
Signat humum, gestit paribus colludere, & iram
Colligit ac ponit temere, & mutantur in horas.

Imberbis juvenis, tandem custode remoto,
Gaudet equis canibusq; & aprici gramine campi:
Cereus in vitium flecti, monitoribus asper,
Utilium tardus provisor, prodigus æris,
Sublimis, cupidusq; & amata relinquere pernix.

Conversis studiis ætas animusq; virilis
Quærit opes & amicitias, infervit honori,
Commisisse cavet quod mox mutare laboret.

Multa senem circum veniunt incommoda, vel quod
Quærit & inventis miser abstinet ac timet uti:
Dilator, spe longus iners, avidusq; futuri,
Difficilis, querulus, laudator temporis acti
Se puero, censor castigatorq; minorum.
Multa ferunt anni venientes commoda secum,
Multa recedentes adimunt; ne forte viriles
Mandentur juveni partes, pueroq; viriles,
Semper in adjunctis ævoq; morabimur aptis.

Aut agitur res in Scenis, aut acta refertur;
Segnius irritant aminos demissa per aures,
Quam quæ sunt oculis subjecta fidelibus, & quæ
Ipse sibit tradit Spectator.
Quodcunq; ostendis mihi sic, incredulus odi.

Neve minor, neu sit quinto productior actu
Fabula, quæ posci vult & spectata reponi;
Nec Deus intersit, nisi dignus vindice nodus
Inciderit, nec quarta loqui persona laboret.

Actoris partes Chorus officiumq; virile
Defendat: neu quid medios intercinat actus
Quod non proposito conducat & hæreat apte;
Ille bonis faveatq; & concilietur amicis,
Et regat iratos, & amet peccare timentes:
Ille dapes laudet mensæ brevis, ille salubrem
Justitiam, legesq; & apertis otia portis;
Ille tegat commissa, Deosq; precetur & oret
Ut redeat miseris, abeat fortuna superbis.

Tibia non, ut nunc, Orichalco vincta, tubæq;
Æmula, sed tenuis simplexq; foramine pauco,
Aspirare & adesse choris erat utilis, &c.
Postquam cœpit agros extendere victor, & urbem
Latior amplecti, muros, &c.
Accessit numerisq; modisq; licentia major;
Sic etiam fidibus voces crevere severis,
Et tulit eloquium insolitum facundia præceps:
Utiliumq; sagax rerum & divina futuri
Sortilegis non discrepuit sententia Delphis.

Carmine qui tragico vilem certavit ob hircum
Incolumi gravitate jocum tentavit, eo quod
Illecebris erat & grata novitate morandus
Spectator, functusq; sacris, & potus, & exlex.

Effutire leves indigna Tragœdia versus,
Ut festis matrona moveri jussa diebus,
Intererit Satyris paulum pudibunda protervis.

Non ego inornata & dominantia nomina solum
Verbaq; Pisones, Satyrorum scriptor amabo;
Nec sic enitar Tragico differre colori
Ut nihil intersit Davusne loquatur, an audax
Pythias, emuncto lucrata Simone talentum:
An custos famulusque Dei Silenus alumni,

Ut sibi quivis
Speret idem, sudet multum frustraq; laboret.

Ne nimium teneris juvenentur versibus unquam,
Aut immunda crepent ignominiosaq; dicta:
Offenduntur enim, quibus est equus & pater & res,
Nec si quid fricti ciceris probat & nucis emtor
Æquis accipiunt animis, donantve coronâ.

At nostri proavi Plautinos & numeros &
Laudavere sales, nimium patienter utrumq;
Ne dicam stultè, mirati; si modo ego & vos
Scimus inurbanum lepido seponere dictum,
Legitimumq; sonum digitis callemus & aure.

Ignotum Tragicæ genus invenisse Camænæ
Dicitur, & plaustris vexisse poëmata Thespis,
Quæ canerent agerentq; peruncti fæcibus ora;
Post hunc personæ pallæq; repertor honestæ
Æichylus & modicis instravit pulpita tignis,
Et docuit magnumq; loqui nitiq; cothurno.
Successit vetus his Comædia non sine multa
Laude: sed in vitium libertas excidit, & vim
Dignam lege regi; lex est accepta, chorusq;
Turpiter obticuit sublato jure nocendi.

Nil intentatum nostri liquere Poetæ,
Nec minimum meruere decus vestigia Græca
Ausi deserere, & celebrare domestica facta:
Nee virtute foret clarisve potentius armis,
Quam lingua, Latium, si non offenderet unum
Quemq; Poetarum limæ labor & mora.

Ingenium miserâ quia fortunatius arte
Credit, & excludit sanos Helicone Poetas
Democritus, bona pars non unguem ponere curat,
Non barbam——
Nanciscetur enim pretium nomenq; Poetæ
Si tribus Anticyris caput insanabile nunquam
Tonsori Licino commiserit;

—— O ego lævus
Qui purgor bilem sub verni temporis horam:
Non alius faceret meliora poemata, verum
Nil tanti est: ergo fungar vice cotis, acutum
Reddere quæ ferrum valet exors ipse secandi;
Munus & officium, nil scribens ipse, docebo:
Unde parentur opes, quid alat formetq; Poetam:
Quid deceat, quid non: quo virtus, quo ferat error.

Scribendi recte sapere est & principium & fons:
Rem tibi Socraticæ poterunt ostendere chartæ,
Verbaq; provisam rem non invita sequuntur.
Qui didicit patriæ quid debeat, & quid amicis,
Quo sit amore parens, quo frater amandus, & hospes,
Quod sit conscripti, quod judicis officium, quæ
Partes in bellum missi ducis, ille profecto
Reddere personæ scit convenientia cuiq;.

Respicere exemplar vitæ morumq; jubebo
Doctum imitatorem, & veras hinc ducere voces;
Fabula nullius veneris, sine pondere & arte,
Valdius oblectat populum meliusq; moratur,
Quam versus inopes rerum nugæq; canoræ.

Graiis ingenium, Graiis dedit ore rotundo
Musa loqui, &c.
Romani pueri longis rationibus assem
Discunt in partes centum diducere; dicat
Filius urbani, si de quincunce remota est
Uncia, quid superest? poteris dixisse, triens, eu
Rem poteris servare tuam.
—— redit uncia, quid sit?
Semis; at hæc animos ærugo & cura peculi
Cum semel imbuerit, speramus carmina fingi
Posse linenda cedro & lævi servando cupresso?

Quicquid præcipies, esto brevis, ut cito dicta
Percipiant animi dociles, teneantq; fideles;
Omne supervacuum pleno de pectore manat.

Ficta voluptatis causa sint proxima veris:
Nec quodcunq; volet poscat sibi fabula credi,
Neu pransæ Lamiæ vivum puerum extrabat alvo.

Centuriæ Seniorum agitant expertia frugis:
Celsi prætereunt austera poemata Rhamnes.
Omne tulit punctum qui miscuit utile dulci,
Lectorem delectando, pariterq; monendo;
Hic meret æra liber Sofiis, hic & mare transit,
Et longum noto Scriptori prorogat ævium.

Sunt delicta tamen, quibus ignovisse velimus;
Non semper feriet quodcunq; minabitur arcus:
Verum ubi plura nitent in carmine, non ego paucis
Offendar maculis, quas aut incuria sudit,
Aut humana parum cavit natura: quid ergo?
Ut scriptor si peccat idem librarius usq;,
Quamvis est monitus, veniâ caret: ut citharædus
Ridetur, chordâ qui semper oberrat eidem:
Sic mihi qui multum cessat fit Chærilus ille,
Quem bis terq; bonum cum risu mirror, & idem
Indignor quandoq; bonus dormitat Homerus;
Verum opere in longo fas est obrepere somnum.

Ut Pictura Poësis erit, quæ si propius stes
Te capiet magis & quædam, si longius abstes;
Hæc amet obscurum, volet hæc sub luce videri;
Hæc placuit semel, hæc decies repetita placebit.

O major juvenum—— hoc tibi dictum
Tolle memor, certis medium & tolerabile rebus
Rectè concedi;———
——- Mediocribus esse Poëtis
Non homines, non Dii, non concessere columnæ
Sic, animis natum inventumq; Poema juvandis,
Si paulum a summo discessit, vergit ad imum.

Ludere qui nescit, campestribus abstinet armis:
Indoctusq; pilæ, discive, trochive, quiescit,
Ne spissæ risum tollant impune coronæ;
Qui nescit, versus tamen audet fingere.——
—— quidni?
Liber, & ingenuus, præsertim census equestrem
Summam nummorum, vitioq; remotus ab omni.
Membranis intus positis, delere licebit
Quod non edideris: nescit vox missa reverti.

Sylvestres homines facer interpresq; Deorum
Cædibus & victu fædo deterruit Orpheus,
——Fuit hæc sapientia quondam
Publica privatis secernere, sacra profanis:
Concubitu prohibere vago, dare jura maritis:
Oppida moliri, leges incidere ligno.
—— Dictæ per carmina sortes
Et vitæ monstrata via est, & gratia regum
Pieriis tentata modis: ludusq; repertus,
Et longorum operum finis.
———— ne forte pudori
Sit tibi Musa lyræ solers & cantor Apollo.

Naturâ fieret laudabile carmen, an arte,
Quæsitum est; Ego nec studium sine divite venâ,
Nec rude quid profit video ingenium; alterius sic
Altera poscit opem res & conjurat amicè.

Qui studet optatam cursu contingere metam,
Multa tulit fecitq; puer; sudavit & alsit,
Abstinuit vener & vino,
Nunc fatis est dixisse, Ego mira poemata pango:
Occupet extremum scabies, mihi turpe relinqui est,
Et quod non didici sane nescire fateri.

Assentatores jubet ad lucrum ire Poeta
Dives agris, dives positis in fænore nummis;
Si vero est unctum qui rectè ponere possit
Et spondere levi pro paupere, & eripere arctis
Litribus implicitum, mirabor, si sciet inter
Noscere mendacem verumq; beatus amicum.
Tu seu donaris, seu quid donare velis cui,
Noilto ad versus tibi factos ducere plenum
Lætitiæ: clamabit enim, pulchre, bene, recte.
—— si carmina condes,
Nunquam te fallant animi sub vulpe latentes

Quintilio siquid recitares, corrige sodes
Hoc aiebat & hoc: melius te posse negares
Bis terque expertum frustra, delere jubelat.
Si defendere delictum, quam vertere, malles,
Nullum ultra verbum aut operam insumebat inanem,
Quin sine rivali teque & tua solus amares.

Ut mala quem scabies aut morbus regius urget,
—- dicam Siculiq; poetæ
Narrabo interium——
Nec semel hoc fecit, nec si retractus erit, jam
Fiet homo, aut ponet famosæ mortis amorem.
Indoctum doctumque fugat recitator acerbus:
Quem vero arripuit, tenet occiditq; legendo;
Non missura cutem, nisi plena cruoris, hirudo.

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